one surrealist a day

Mumbo King decrees: "Killer robot, destroy underperforming Mumbo & Jive contributors!"

Mumbo & Jive Buzzkill Fridays

Note: Each Friday, Mumbo & Jive seeks to get your weekend started off wrong by posting a total bummer right as you are getting ready to go out, each and every Friday evening.

Welcome once again to our weekly feature, Mumbo & Jive presents: Buzzkill Fridays. This edition is a special treat--Brian and Zay voted in favor of the domestic violence photo essay, while The Conman and Jake backed the modern slavery film. As MB abstained (not something he frequently does), the final decision was up to me.

As chief executive editor of Mumbo & Jive (a title bestowed to the person who posts nearly 100% of posts for the last three years), I decided to post both! I'm the chief executive editor, I do have that kind of power. So, to kill your buzz this weekend:

Shane & Maggie

Stolen

You wouldn't think such a scrawny girl could do pushups...

I'm sorry. I should feed it, maybe?

At first, I thought someone dropped a bunch of flaming car tires onto the unsuspecting town below...

Mumbo & Jive Badass Fridays

Here at Mumbo & Jive, we like to highlight a total fucking badass for our readers each and every Friday. With much debate from our staff, we settled on Bayard Rustin for this week's badass:

"I love Jesus, it's just that his followers are a bunch of hideous fuckers" -Gandhi

Retro Thursday: What were we laughing about in 2008?

Because I couldn't remember which one it was:

Improve your Chinese takeout wushu

Yeah, we've been doing this totally wrong:

FAVORITE TAG PARTICIPANT: DENNEHY / FAVORITE TAG SITE: MISSOULA

SHOCKING BUT TRUE: Rich person forced to fly economy class--lives to tell the tale--and does

You truly are lawyers for asses: Another Braun Man-approved internet website

Retro Thursday: What were we laughing about in 2008?

~

Mumbo & Jive Play on Words Alert: "Being both men of elevated minds..."

"...it was a global dick-wagging contest on a scale never before seen in human history..."

Mumbo & Jive irony alert: "...and then come home and bomb Cambodia..."

Cows to horriffic traffic accident: "NBD"

All cows survived unharmed.

...ummm...